I am taking the train....

No more driving! I have worked in NYC for 6 years and for the first maybe 6 months, I took the subway everyday from our apartment in Yonkers. I would either drive down to the 1/9 train or take a cab every day. It was a pain in the ass. So was transferring to the 2/3 express at 96th Street with the hoards of crowds. I hated every single minute of it. Then I got pregnant with Gavin. My morning sickness was horrendous. I would have to go running off the subway to throw up in a trash can. So, I started to drive. I found a cheap garage- $200.00 per month and I was perfectly fine to drive. It took too long to get to work and back, but I did not care. I could deal with my morning sickness by myself while listening to music and not having anyone falling asleep on my shoulder. I got spoiled and I kept driving...until tomorrow. After 5 years of driving, I am starting to take the train. For the months of July and August, I will forgo the car altogether and walk every day from my home to the Metro North and catch the 4/5 at Grand Central. I will repeat on the way home. I am sure in the sweltering heat, I will hate it. But so far, June has not proven to be a heat wave. I need time to relax so I am hoping the combination of reading something pleasant, while listening to my ipod and having someone else at the wheel, will accomplish that. I will keep you updated on my travels.

Its finally over

All testing has been completed. Finally. I know it was only two months ago that we miscarried, but it feels like it was an eternity, waiting for all the testing to be complete. And who knew? We are completely normal. No clotting disorders, thyroid issues, biopsy came back fine and so did the HSG test. So... why then? I am happy that nothing is wrong, please do not get me wrong. I guess I just do not understand. If it was one time, then sure, I would get it. It happens. But twice is still unsettling. But the next step is to try, try again. So we will. When we tried the first time, we got pregnant in one month. When we tried the second time, it took a few months. The first month we tried with just guessing when I was ovulating and trying to get it right on the right days. The second month, I started using the clearblue easy monitor to tell me when the right days were since a friend had one and she offered it. The third month, I tried the Clearblue and temping and charting. Nuts, maybe. I am a control freak and I have no patience. Yes, even with God and mother nature. Temping and charting consists of taking your basal body temperature every morning at the same time (if you can, I learned I was not so good at that) to monitor the progesterone levels in your body. During a womans cycle, when the egg is released the ovaries make progesterone to aid in pregnancy. If you fertilize the egg, the ovaries continue to make progesterone until the placenta takes over at 12 weeks. If you do not fertilize the egg, the progesterone stops and your period comes. So during the time the ovaries are making progesterone, your body temperature is higher. If you take your basal body temp which is just a more sensitive thermometer and it measures more accurately. For example, it would say 98.66 rather than 98.6. So your temp is high during the time your body makes progesterone. It stays high if you are pregnant and just for fun, at times your body temp takes a dip when the egg implants so you chart all of your temps and you can basically tell if you are pregnant from this, prior to testing. It does work. I knew I was pregnant. If you enter all your temps into a website called fertility friend, it makes a cute chart for you, a graph and monitors your symptoms giving you percentages based on that data with respect to if you are pregnant or not. I know, it sounds crazy, but trying to get pregnant is far more difficult that you think. This time, at least for now, we are not going to do any of that. I am going to take a much more relaxed approach and just see if it happens. I am too tired to put all the effort in right now. But that could change, depending on how nature works.

Some test results and a recipe

Testing, testing, testing. We are almost done. Nick had his blood work and I have had a biopsy since my bloodwork. So far I have no clotting disorders and no genetic problems. Yay!!!!! Just waiting on the thyroid results, Nicks genetic results and the results of the biopsy. I have the HSG test in a couple of weeks and I am done! We wait for results and then we can figure out when its time to try again. I am looking forward to it. I am hopeful it will stick this time, although fully aware that it may not. It will be scary, but I am trying to make some positive life changes in the meantime and attempt to get my stress levels down. Nick and I are re-committing to being healthy. God, I wish I could just make a committment and stick with it already. My up and down, in and out, hate and love affair with getting healthy is very tiring!

So I will keep you all posted. (Who are you all I wonder... or is anyone even reading this ever???)

Anyway, I wanted to post a recipe. I love to cook so much that I wish I could do it for a living and lately I have been making a very simple, semi-homemade sauce that is great. So I wanted to share:

Penne Puttanesca

1/4 c capers (stored in salt if you can find, if not just use the ones in oil)
1 c of olives (I like kalamata, but can be any mix of greek, green and black olives)
1 small zucchini
1 large or 2 small garlic cloves
1/2 of one small white onion
handful of fresh basil
olive oil
1 jar of tomato sauce- I use Silvios Sunday Sauce - whatever you use make sure its thin and not too salty
Salt and Pepper
OPTIONAL: anchovy fillets and red pepper flakes
Penne (I use whole wheat and the sauce is strong so the pasta is very overpowered)

In a non-stick pan heat 2 T of olive oil. Add onions and garlic and fry until just starting to brown. Chop zucchini into thin disks and add to the oil mixture and sautee until soft. Add capers and olives and heat until warmed through. (If you are using anchovies, add now.) If you used capers in salt and kalamata olives- DO NOT ADD MORE SALT (until the end after you have tasted this). If you used capers in oil and regular black and green olives - salt at this time. Not too much salt, about 1/2 t- 1t depending on how much you like salt. Add jar of sauce. (If you are using red pepper flakes add now- 1/2 t) Mix thoroughly and allow to simmer on the stove for approximately 30 minutes. Just before tossing with the pasta, give the basil a rough chop and mix into sauce. Now toss with pasta and enjoy!