What a day yesterday was. I got up, which that in and of itself is a miracle these days what with the current hip, back and leg pain. Oh and the pressure. I get ready for work, get Gavin ready for school, we leave and do our morning routine which consists of driving to school while chatting about various subjects. It happened to be birds and nests. Gavin thinks we should name all the birds we see and try to keep track of them so we know where they are. I will keep you updated on how that goes! Anyway, I drop him off and head to work.
My first appointment with the pediatric orthopedist at the NY Center for Clubfoot at Hospital for Joint Disease is at 1pm. I leave my office at 12:15. I arrive on time or even a few minutes early. I sign my name on the sign in sheet and I am number 8 on the list. I do not know the relevance of this yet, but oh do I find out! I sit next to a tired looking couple with twin girls! The babies are so teensy. I suddenly feel so overwhelmed by looking at this couple. I feel like I already know what they are going through and in reality, I have no idea yet. I feel relieved because the other doctors I spoke to have told me that clubfoot is common in twins, but I did not really believe them and not for any reason, but I felt like they were trying to calm my fears. Anyway, I am in this waiting room with many babies, probably about 6. There are also 8 children there ranging from 2 years old to 12 years old. I find myself staring at all the kids feet and I cannot see one thing wrong with them. They all wear different shoes and no one seems to have a gait problem. There are a couple of teenagers or young adults that have visable issues and I wonder to myself, if they had early intervention.
I watch as the babies are called to the back. The twins are gone and I wanted to follow them. I wanted to watch their appointment and endlessly bombard them with questions. Instead, prior to their leaving the waiting room, I asked how old they were and asked if anyone was sleeping in their house. They are 11 days old and no, no one is sleeping. So I left them alone. I sit and wait. And sit and wait and sit and wait. I hear the receptionist saying tha two people were just squeezed in and did not have appointments, but they needed casts so they took them. She apologizes to no one in particular and maybe to herself for the craziness of the day. I am hot and I feel my cheeks are burning. I am hungry and I am thirsty. I sit for two hours and when I am on the verge of a mental breakdown (mostly due to the fact that the woman next to me has been singing the theme song to Bonanza for literally 1 hour straight to her granddaughter) they call my name. They made a mistake. I should have been called first so I could watch the appointments. They are sorry. I am upset, but what can I do. I am not coming back on a different day. There is only so much I can take.
I meet the doctor. I like her. She is clearly in a rush. She doesn't want to discourage me from asking all my questions and I do, faster than I would like, but I get them out. She wants me to meet the twin parents and the parents who have a baby who is on his second cast. I do go in the rooms. I see the casted babies. I ask a few questions. I am so exhausted at this point that I am not even sure what I want to know. Mostly, I ask how the baby did, how the baby slept after, if they thought the babies were in pain.
As I leave, I feel overwhelmed still. I feel like every Tuesday I will be in a mad dash to hurry up and get my name on the list early. I will be there for a long time. I feel like I have no idea how I could possible ever bring the two babies by myself. Tuesdays will be hectic and we will be tired and it will be a long day. I feel fine about the doctors capabilities, but I felt fine about those after I researched them to no end.
In the end, I am not sure I feel any better than I did before I went to the appointment, but its all certainly more real. I am glad I met the doctor, saw the office and have already learned that if you are not number one on the waiting list, you will make your life hell. I suppose, that information alone is invaluable!
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