Happy Friday. Tonight Nick and I are off to Chicago for my sister-in-laws law school graduation and to celebrate my mother-in-laws birthday and my in-laws 40th wedding anniversary. Needless to say, I have so many cards with me, its beginning to look like I own stock in Hallmark. It should be a fun weekend. Tonight is pizza night in Chicago. I am not sure I love Chicago Style Pizza but Kate says there is a great place and I trust she would only bring me to the best. I will report back in a few days, as you know I am the self-proclaimed pizza queen. Tomorrow is a fancy dinner in honor of our honorees and Sunday we fly back. My mom and dad have Gavin and Lola for the weekend and hopefully we will have a good time. I am not terribly fond of travelling. I like going places however, I can do without the plane rides and baggage and traffic. Not to mention the control freak in me does not ever feel comfortable with other people planning what I will be doing. Yes, even if they live there and I have never been there.
On a completely different note, I am searching for a therapist. Its amazing to me that of the ones listed by my insurance so far none of the ones I have called are taking new patients. Or they just don't call me back. I am getting really frustrated. Right now, I feel like I take one step forward and feel better for a day or two and then two steps back and I feel like crap. I cry at the drop of the hat. I cry almost every single day at some point. I do it alone. I do not want to worry Nick or Gavin. But I know its not normal. So I wish someone would call me back and we could set up an appointment. I am not sure which step of greiving I am on, but if there is one called "depressed, crying, emotional, angry, short of patience and downer" it seems to be where I am stuck. I want to get out of this hole.
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